Thought You’d Wanna Know: This e-mega-zine is currently on a once-every-Monday-up-goes-a-fresh-batch-of-good-stuff schedule! The following was posted 03.26.07. Please share this site with ALL your friends! Just copy and paste this URL into an email and send it to them - and THANKS! www.DAXRICH.com
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(2) CONAN O’BRIEN ‘SMUCKLES:’
‘’The U.S. Government has hired several psychics to help find Osama Bin Laden. So far, the psychics haven’t been able to find Osama Bin Laden, but they predict that soon, he’ll find true love.'’
‘’In Hong Kong, a 107 year old man says he’s lived so long because of his decision to give up sex. When asked why he gave up sex the man said, ‘’I Had to - I only love older women.”’
(Coincidentally: A couple nights back, Conan had a bit, where some fake worthless money was invented, called . . . ‘’SMICKLES!'’)
(1) DAX ‘SMUCKLE:’
An invisible man married an invisible woman. In time, they had children, but they were nothing to look at either.
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Last week I asked: ‘’Think you can come up with the LONGEST palindrome in the English language? If so, email me and if you’re amongst the first 20 correct respondents, I’ll send you a nice gift worth at least forty bux! Deadline is Friday, March 23rd!'’
Surprisingly, we received 9 correct answers! I think that was a tough one, so congratulations! Each of them has been sent a free ‘’That Old DAX Magic!'’ - our most popular NON money-making publication ever! It’s a large, fully-illustrated book that reveals 53 professional-quality, mind-blowing illusions that truly mystify!
One such - as taken directly from the book (pg #65):
‘’GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!'’
This is one of my personal, all-time, absolute favorites!
If you have a flair for the dramatic, both you and your audience will love this one! It is a bit complicated from the standpoint of several ‘impossible’ events that take place, but once you understand how it works you will have no trouble presenting the illusion.
Originally, the high point of drama for this particular extraordinary illusion centered on one’s lighting a cigarette, but nowadays, that act has very negative connotations so, I would substitute another object, perhaps an intact fruit such as a grapefruit, orange other such that can be easily torn apart in front of the audience.
WHAT THE AUDIENCE SEES
You ask for someone to temporarily loan you a twenty dollar bill: You promise, of course, to return it - until you get your hands on it - and then for fun, add . . . ‘’Maybe!'’
You then pick up an envelope and start to place the twenty inside, but pause, and read out the serial number from the bill - asking that someone in the audience write it down.
Next, you fold the bill once, then once again and insert it into the envelope. Lick it shut. Show it to the audience so they can see it - both sides. For extra effect, you may have someone nearby FEEL the folded bill through the envelope. ‘’Yep, it’s in there, all right!'’
Now, slowly, mysteriously, place a grapefruit on a small table in full view of everybody. Place the envelope with the $20 bill next to it. On the table you will have previously also placed an ashtray and a hand towel.
Ask if anyone has a book of matches or a lighter. Have them come to where you are and ignite one corner of the envelope. Allow the envelope to burn, holding it as long as you can without getting burned. Drop it into the ashtray.
Exclaim, ‘’Yikes! I hope I didn’t goof on this trick! It’s the first time I’ve ever done it, frankly! If so, I guess you’re out that twenty bux, huh?'’
‘’Oh, wait a minute . . . I remember now . . .'’
Ask the person who gave you the original twenty to come to you, hand him/her the towel and over it you break open the grapefruit in full view of the audience - revealing a rolled-up bill. Naturally, you hand that to the person before you, and ask that it be unrolled and the serial number read aloud.
Whoever jotted down the number at the start of the trick will confirm that indeed, the serial number is correct! That can mean only one thing: The twenty dollar bill was not only burned to ashes - it has also somehow, magically ‘re-grown’ inside a grapefruit!
You REALLY want to learn how to do this one, don’t you?! I don’t blame you - it’s a dilly! Let’s go . . .
And so YOU will, if you were one of those who were sent a copy as your reward for answering last week’s query. If not, but you’d like to BUY that truly exiting book and instantly start amazing all your friends, relatives, inlaws and outlaws, just mail $46.50 - check, money order or your VISA or Mastercard data to: DAX-MAGIC, Box 447, Centreville, MI 49047-0447 and I’ll make a copy magically appear ON your mailbox! (It’s too cotton-pickin’ BIG to put INTO your mail box!)
Should you require a bit of additional ‘colorful’ inspiration before ordering, go to: http://www.daxrich.com/abracadabra-2/
Oh, did you want to know what IS the longest palindrome in the English language? ’tis: ‘’redivider.'’ And in case you’ve forgotten what a palindrome IS - it’s any word or group of words that reads the same forwards or backwards.
And this: There has been a longstanding argument about what is the longest palindrome, but we specifically asked for an ENGLISH (American) word. The foreign one that is often mentioned is 15,139 WORDS long and yes, it is the same when read forwards or backwards, BUT the thing was created by a computer program and is just a jumble of words that make no sense.
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DEAN’S RANT: ‘’Mum’s The Word!'’
MONEY-MAKING: How To Earn $200.00 An Hour Writing Simple Letters!
A ‘SITE’ TO BEHOLD: Needs Home-Based Research Workers!
PONDER THIS: Neil Cavuto (Finally) Agrees With DAX!
WATCH YOUR BACK: Chrysler Now Joins GM And Ford on the DAX *hit List!
DAX-YAX: When The Kids Set Up Housekeeping . . .
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DEAN’S RANT: ‘’Mum’s The Word!'’
This week I have little or nothing to say HERE, because I’ll be more than making up for it under WATCH YOUR BACK a bit further down the page.
Thus, I will now simply . . . shut up!
-Dean
P.S. Did just think of ONE thing worth mentioning: Donald Trump was recently asked what he thought we should do about the war. He instantly replied, ‘’Declare victory and get everybody outta there!'’
That’s even more succinct than my own observation a couple weeks back which was, ‘’To those Americans who worry about our leaving Iraq in defeat, why don’t we just tell the commanders to order their troops to ‘’Advance To The Rear!'’ and then, just have ‘em keep on ‘advancing’ until they get home?!'’
There’s a reason why Trump’s ‘’illions'’ start with a B whilst my own commence with a mere M . . . He just cuts through all the crap and gets to the MAIN POINT quickly! Whilst yours truly is as windy as a Spring tornado in Kansas . . .
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MONEY-MAKING: How To Earn $200.00 An Hour Writing Simple Letters!
Boy! That sounds like an alluring headline for a good ol’ ‘ten-dollar’ book, eh wot? Well, ten-dollar books now cost 30 bux but it is possible, nevertheless, to in fact, earn a nice two hundred dollars per hour with this particular concept.
HOW & WHY!
Blame television. Blame our deteriorating educational systems - blame whatever you like, but the fact is, many people today - including some of the nation’s top executives, cannot organize their thoughts sufficiently to write a letter to fit the most basic of situations.
Many are totally at a loss when it comes to composing a letter either to complain about some serious infraction, or to submit a resume to a prospective employer or even (and get this!) to dash off a love note to a sweetheart!
That’s where YOU may cash in (provided that you can, in fact, compose those relatively simple letters).
YOUR BUSINESS
Offer a problem-solving letter-writing service where, for a nominal fee ($50.00 and up, depending upon the type of letter and amount of effort involved) you take the customer’s (client’s) problem out of his mind, put it into words and onto paper, and thus resolve your client’s dilemma.
A quality typewriter would be the basic requirement, although naturally, if you are equipped with a computer or at least, a word-processor, the entire process will be much easier for you and present a better impression.
In most situations, you will be using your client’s stationery, as such letters will appear to have emanated from his or her firm. Nevertheless, you will probably want some decent-looking stationery of your own.
You know, that stuff really does not need to cost an arm and a leg. For years, we have had our own stationery printed by a regular ‘fast-printer’ because if you select a quality paper and a really good ink, the whole thing can look unusual as well as very professional. Just make certain that #10 (business-size) envelopes are available in a matching paper color and texture.
Other items you’ll want at your fingertips include a good dictionary and most likely, a thesaurus.
There is a lady who averages well over that $200.00 an hour doing this (according to the New York Times) and there’s no reason why you couldn’t do just as well - regardless of where you live - as there are semi-illiterates in NEED of this service across the land, believe me!
To hone your own letter writing skills, check your library business reference section for books such as ‘’Words Into Type'’ (Prentice Hall) and ‘’Writing With precision'’ (by Jefferson D. Bates, Published by Acropolis).
A short classified ad in your local newspaper (Sunday business section would seem best), plus whatever free local publicity you can muster should get you started, but once underway, word-of-mouth and repeat customers should keep you and your typewriter or ‘puter humming away.
Good luck - good writing - and great income!
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A ‘SITE’ TO BEHOLD: Needs Home-Based Research Workers!
This company says they’re now hiring home-based workers to complete online research assignments. You can learn much more by checking out the advertisement at our sister site, DAX HYBRID-POWERED AD-BLAST! Just click here:
http://dax-power-blast.com/61-80/ - Can’t miss it - it’s the first ad on the page!
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PONDER THIS: Neil Cavuto (Finally) Agrees With DAX!
Long-time DAX-DOER Neil Cavuto, who has a daily program on Fox News television, in a recent commentary which he titled - as DAX does with all OUR rants - raves and reports - stated that we are now a nation of people who fail to keep our word. As such, in his piece he entitled ‘’Common Sense,'’ he suggested that failing alone will literally be the ‘’undoing of America!'’
Good to see others arriving at that conclusion - one that we have preached as FACT in varying ways over and over for many years - via many features in both our print and online media; ‘’Good, Bad & Iffy,'’ Watch Your Back!,'’ For What It’s Worth'’ and others.
Examples of this deterioration of both business and personal relationships abound and Cavuto had his own list, which involved the omnipresent salesperson who promises all, gets the sale and delivers very little. And often (as we have ALL discovered) forget just how valuable you ARE as a customer AFTER THE FACT!)
I cannot count the number of people I have fired on the spot over the years because they failed to treat MY HIGHLY VALUABLE CUSTOMERS properly! Anyone who pays ME money to buy my product or service is KING or QUEEN in my mind! Without contented customers, no business has ANY business! PERIOD!
Let me give you one quick personal example of how important it USED to be for Americans to ‘’keep their word.'’ Years ago, in my ‘’yute'’ (and long-time DAXERS know WHY I spell it that way) . . . when I was a fledgling bill collector in Lansing, Michigan - working for the late Roger Dean Rose - who became one of my lifelong friends and also, for a few years, was one of MY employees, late one day informed me that the next morning the Regional Manager would be coming down from Detroit for a special meeting. It was vital that all staff be there on time.
The next day, I arose, got ready to go to the office and discovered that my 1958 Chrysler hardtop was sitting on the ground - literally. Seems it had an air bag suspension that had deflated and it was obvious THAT car was going nowhere. Well, I had promised to be at the office at 8:00 A. M. sharp and it was now 7:30 A.M. It was also in the dead of winter and freezing cold. No time to even call a taxi!
I literally RAN the full distance from my apartment to the downtown Lansing office and also literally frosted (and damaged) both lungs, but I GOT there - long before anybody else - including the Regional Manager from Detroit! (Turned out the whole affair was in MY honor - to award me for being the top producer in the company’s network of 23 offices across the Midwest!)
THAT is a small example of what ‘’keeping your word'’ is all about . . . or at least, it USED to be! I can tell you that in today’s world it is SO seldom that ANYONE we deal with ACTUALLY does what they tell us they’re going to do - WHEN they said they would do it - that I am SHOCKED when anybody actually ‘’comes through!'’
Does not seem like that’s the way it should be - but it is the way it IS! Never have I seen such a variety of excuses and reasons why someone cannot adhere to a schedule, keep a commitment or honor a promise. It is truly sad.
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WATCH YOUR BACK: Chrysler Now Joins GM And Ford on the DAX *hit List!
At the start of summer 2003, I decided to replace our little sun ‘n fun car with a new one. Years earlier, I had bought the red BMW convertible and had it trucked to Vegas for my 6 month R&D stint on the gaming industry.
From that, as you may now, evolved several highly popular works including one of the famous DAX Premium Info Data Programs, the ‘’DAX-Vegas Wagering System'’ ($1,000.00) plus the ‘’DAX Superior Slots Success!'’ ($149.50) - considered one of the best and biggest-sellers in history ON the subject, as well as many feature articles, etc.
After my Vegas stay (which also involved buying, rehabbing and selling a nifty property out in Boulder City), I had the car (which had never had its top put UP even once whilst I was there!) trucked back to Michigan. Shortly thereafter, I met SuEllen and we enjoyed that little red road bomb for quite awhile.
But by 2003, I was really tired of the all-black leather interior which retained the sun’s heat and really showed the dirt and dust. Also, with an injured shoulder rotor cuff, I was unable to easily raise the convertible top which oddly, was manually operated.
So, I called the BMW dealer in Kalamazoo and told them what I wanted to buy and they said that normally, it would take 6 - 8 months to get it, BUT it so happened that they had precisely what I was looking for right now - on the showroom floor! I said, I’d be right up there and left at once. On the way I was thinking of how great it would be to have a different color for a change - silver with black top and a red leather interior - plus, it now had a motorized top!
As soon as we got there we found the salesman but he said that the car we had just driven 40 miles to see - had been sold! I told him that we would like to see it anyway, and he actually had the audacity to declare that not only had it been sold but, it had already been delivered! I suggested that was rather hard to believe:
That, in the span of 45 minutes they had found a buyer, moved the vehicle out of the showroom, serviced it and the buyer had driven OFF with it?! ‘’But of course, Mr. Du Vall, we would be glad to ORDER one for you - just the way you want it - it only takes 6 - 8 months to get it here!'’ I don’t THINK so, you lying bastard!
Thus, another miscreant went on the DAX list: No more BMWs, at least, not from the dealer in Kazoo!
I was ticked and on the way home, SuEllen said, maybe I should consider another brand - why not a domestic one for a change? Now, around DAX-Land ‘’them are fightin’ words'’ as we have had SO much trouble with American made vehicles over the years - which I have documented several times:
Five brand new Cadillacs, three Lincolns, two Ford Explorers, a sprinkling of everything else - Oldsmobiles, Pontiacs, and so forth - 65 different vehicles all totalled (so far) and many were made in the U.S. of A. and MOST of ‘em were lemons.
Our only non-problematic vehicles have been our Mercedes (2), BMW’s (4), Volkswagen convertibles (5) Lexus (2), Rolls-Royces (3), a few other British cars (TR6, MGBs - 4 all totalled) ) and the one pasta pal, a striking liquid- silver-colored Alfa Romeo roadster with a black top and a red leather interior. Actually, the same color combo I had hoped to get in the new BMW.
Now that I’m reminiscing: That was ALSO the exact same color combo of a new Rolls-Royce Silver Wreath that I ordered in London some years ago when my late/great friend Hameed and I were in the midst of our ‘’Mid-Life-Crisis-Backpacking-Throughout-Europe Tour!'’ I was in my late forties - he was ten years older - and one day we just decided to pack up and go to Europe and Asia on an open-ended basis for a couple months - but that is another story -a VERY interesting one, to be sure! (It’s a wonder that our then-wives haven’t written about it all!)
Regardless, when we got back to the states - Hameed convinced me that the color combo I’d chosen on a car that large (and it was the long wheel base model) would not look right - so I cancelled that one and got a two-tone blue, instead . . .
Anyway, on that early summer day in 2003 SuEllen and I stopped at the Chrysler dealership in Vicksburg, Michigan as I had seen a picture of the new Sebring Convertible for 2004 on-line - it was being released far earlier than usual. They had one on the showroom floor and I decided to buy it then and there.
Note to BMW Kazoo nincompoops: I always write a check for the full amount of ANYTHING I buy - cars, boats, houses, commercial buildings or whatever.
There is NO waiting for financing, no delay for anything - nevertheless, it was not until the next day before we were able to take delivery of the ‘’off-the-showroom-floor Sebring'’ so, you guys at BMW in Kazoo must truly be miracle workers to have fully effectuated the sale of that silver/black/red BMW all within 45 minutes, eh wot?!
Anyway, I paid way too much for the Sebring, of course - as will happen when one is pissed and acts impulsively. However, it seemed like so much LESS than I had been paying for cars in recent years - some of which, including each of the three brand new Rolls Royces cost upwards of $250,000.00.
Indeed, the BMW that I had planned to purchase was around $50,000 - so, the Sebring at $32,000 seemed cheap. I later learned that it was overpriced by several thousand bux - and could be had just about anywhere else for around $25,000.00.
But I liked the car - and it would be closer to have it serviced and summer was upon us - so we dropped the top and had a lot of fun with it. From the beginning there were only two things wrong with it - the driver’s side seat belt would not retract properly and there was a loud rattle in the right door window.
When I took it back for service the Chrysler people said that the rattle was caused by a ‘’bad'’ right rear wheel so, they ordered a new one - no cost to me - the company would pay for it. As for the errant seat belt, they said there was nothing they could do about that . . . huh?!
At the time, just for posterity, I filed a legal statement with the County Clerk to the effect that if I were to be in a crash and the seat belt failed - AND I perished - it would be the fault of Chrysler - most notably, the Vicksburg Chrysler Dealership! I knew very well that the belt retraction mechanism was defective and simply needed to be replaced.
When the new wheel came in they phoned and wanted us to make an appointment to have the wheels switched, but I said not to bother as meanwhile, I had sprayed a bit of rubber lubrication on the window gaskets and eliminated the squeak which I knew all along was NOT in any way caused by a ‘’bad'’ rear wheel. I later confirmed that by an independent tire dealer when I had the cheap factory tires replaced with some premium quality rubber.
Anyway, for the next three years we faithfully took the Sebring in for servicing - oil changes and the like, tire rotation, etc. All was well, although for what it’s worth, I just noticed in reviewing the file they never seemed to have done the full compliment of servicing at the 18,000 mile mark - some major stuff they overlooked for some reason.
Regardless, I thought it was overdue for us to replace the Sebring with a new car for the upcoming 2007 summer season - and why not get one of the totally revamped 2008 models which offer a retractable hard top? Thus, the other day when I went to have an oil change, I also decided to find a salesman and order a new 2008, as I was sure the little dealership would not actually have one in stock, or if they did, it would not be the color or be equipped the way I would want it.
Now, the fellow who originally sold me the 2004 Sebring was long gone - fairly common in the car business - they literally, ‘’come and go.'’ I liked that guy - he had played basketball at MSU with Magic Johnson whom I knew from when I lived in East Lansing and also, SuEllen and I happened to bump into him in the elevator at the Place De La Concord Hotel where we were all staying in Paris when Magic was there playing some big International game - just before he announced to the world his AIDS condition.
So, I went looking for a salesman TWICE whilst my car was being serviced - but whilst there were several of ‘em milling about back in their little offices, no one ever came to the fore to assist me or take my order - nor could I even find any literature on the new vehicle I was interested in.
NO problem, as earlier in the day I had been informed that the Camry Solara convertible was a great car and, that CONSUMER REPORTS had placed it on their ‘recommended’ list, further saying, ‘’It could pass for a Lexus since the styling is similar to the SC430’s and its interior is impeccable.'’
Indeed, out of 16 new models of Toyota, they had recommended a full TWELVE! No other manufacturer came even close - other than Lexus (which SuEllen still drives - cannot pry her out of it - her second one!) And of course, Lexus is manufactured by Toyota, as well. No wonder they are poised to take over the entire world as the number one purveyor of fine and reliable vehicles!
And certainly, no wonder Chrysler is also poised - but on the brink of disaster - ready to be gobbled up by another manufacturer who has the $$$ and the poor business judgment to take it over. Mercedes tried that once - remember?
So, we’ll just trade the Sebring for a new Solara. No big deal - I’m fairly certain the Toyota folks will be more than happy to sell us one . . .
Meanwhile, back at the service shop: The Sebring’s battery was nearly 4 years old and I had no desire to get stuck somewhere with a dead battery between now and the time of getting my new car. (That DID happen one Sunday morning when I went out to get the newspaper with the particular BMW I referenced earlier!) And occasionally, when I started up the Sebring it sounded like it had hit the snooze button and wanted a few more moments of rest.
I also did not feel right about blind-siding the new owner of the Sebring after I traded it for a Solara. Karma, you know. And if you DON’T - check out ‘’My Name is Earl’ - on Thursday night, NBC! - A quick DAX commercial for you, there! So, I asked the middle-aged woman who checked me in to install a new battery. She suggested that they check it out first to see if it really NEEDED to be replaced. Okay, that made sense.
Awhile later, she came to the waiting room to tell me that, yes, it was weak and should be replaced. Okay, How much? Oh, about $76.00. Okay - go ahead. Plus, she says, ‘’About $80 to install it.'’ Pregnant pause. ‘’Huh? You’re gonna charge me eighty bux to install a $76.00 battery? I believe from past experience, whenever someone buys a battery it is automatically installed at NO cost whatsoever: What’s the deal?'’
She explained that the idiots who designed the vehicle had deigned to position the battery behind the front left wheel and some sort of panel that was accessible only by removing said wheel and panel, etc. THEY were at fault - not her and her staff. Hence, the eighty bux.
I’m thinking . . . ‘’Wait - not MY Fault the idiots you work for defectively designed the access to a common auto part - I mean, we’re not talking about a major item, say, the transmission or something- it’s a plain old, dumb, simple battery, no?!'’
Anyway, I declined her offer to sell me the battery and installation service - which she verbally estimated would cost a total of about $175.00. (The two previously stated figures did NOT add up to that in my mental calculator). I KNEW I could get it for less cost elsewhere and with ME - if you know me AT all - it IS the principal - NOT the money!
She left and then made me wait an inordinate amount of time to come tell me the oil change had been completed. Now, understand, it generally takes about 15 - 20 minutes. In this instance, I had been there for well over an hour AND 15 minutes!
When I go to pay the bill, it’s $28.95 for the oil change and filter . . . fine . . . but there’s MORE: An extra $30.00 - for telling me I should replace the battery - WHICH I DAMN WELL ASKED HER TO DO IN THE FIRST PLACE!
I refused to pay the vigorish, but the morbidly obese woman who takes your money at the store informed me that I could not have my car back unless I DID pay it! Some of my Detroit and Vegas ‘’friends'’ call that ‘’protection money . . . ‘’
So, I paid the demanded ransom - wrote ‘’Paid Under Protest'’ on all documents - especially, the one which had the FALSE declaration: ‘’Customer hereby acknowledges receiving original estimate of $60.00 (+ tax)'’ which simply was NOT the case, as for some odd reason, this was the very FIRST time since I’d been taking the car in every few months for four years the woman did NOT produce a service order for me to sign BEFORE they started to work on the car!
THE UPSHOT
When I returned to the office I phoned the dealership’s manager, Monti Long, - he avoided me - had probably already heard about what had happened in his store and suspected what was ABOUT to happen after he heard my name - thus, had his assistant sales manager, Cal Somebody (Fantu? - Kannan? - cannot read my own writing!) take my call. I informed him of what was about to happen:
1. He was going to credit my card with the $30.00 false charge his people had made or we would simply sue him for the sum. Yes! I will sue for a lousy single buck if someone tries to screw me! And I don’t care if it costs me a thousand bux to do so - and sometimes, it DOES! THAT’s what being wealthy is for - NOT a bunch of flashy BLING! Now, if I can just convince SuEllen of that . . .
2. We would be filing a formal complaint with the Michigan Attorney General.
3. We would detail our entire experience and the dealership’s sad attempt to boost their bottomline by cheating us - and pass along that data to Chrysler headquarters as well as alert the full readership of THIS e-mega-zine to their shenanigans.
If you think about it . . . whilst YOU may live in Phoenix, or Miami, or Cleveland or anywhere else in the world you may say ‘’who cares?'’ - about some pissant car dealership in some even pissier-ant village of Vicksburg, Michigan, yet . . .
. . . the old saying ‘’a fish rots from the head down'’ applies here: If that little aforementioned pissant Chrysler dealership in some Southwest podunk Michigan village is treating its customers as they are - you can be DAMN sure the rest of the company is just as bad - or more likely, worse. That’s just the way business MOSTLY works today . . . in America.
An exception and a footnote: Within ten minutes of my phone call to the Sales Manager at Chrysler, I had lined up a local independent dealer for Interstate Batteries (CONSUMER REPORTS says it’s a top-notch brand) and got the thing installed the same day - total price $76.48!
See? There’s still a glimmer of hope that a few American entrepreneurial types are eager to run a business properly and fairly!
QUICK UPDATE: As we go to press, we can report that, not surprising, a check arrived from the Chrysler dealer to reimburse us for the FULL tab for the fiasco . . . for the CASH outlay, that is - but ‘’0′’ for loss of time, aggravation, phone calls, high blood pressure spike, etc.
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DAX-YAX: When The Kids Set Up Housekeeping . . .
Danny and Beth are each only 10 years old, but are convinced they are in love. One day they decide they want to get married so Danny goes to Beth’s father to ask for her hand in marriage. Upon hearing this, startled but amused, Mr. Johnson says, ‘’Well Danny, you and Beth are only ten: Where will you live?'’
Without even pausing to think, the boy says, ‘’In Beth’s room. It’s bigger than mine and we can both fit into it nicely.'’
Mr. Johnson thinks this is simply adorable! Grinning a bit, he asks, ‘’Well okay . . . but how will you live? You’re not old enough to get a job: How will you support my Beth?'’
Again, Danny doesn’t even blink and says, ‘’Well, I get $10.00 a week allowance and Beth gets $5.00. I figure that’s $60.00 a month which should be enough - what with our not having to pay rent or buy food.'’
A bit shocked that Danny has obviously put so much thought into the matter, Mr. Johnson thinks to himself that he should come up with a question neither Danny nor Beth has considered: ‘’It sounds like you’ve got just about everything covered, but what will you do if you two should have little ones of your own? They are very expensive, you know.'’
Danny just shrugs his shoulders and says, ‘’Well, so far we’ve been lucky.'’
Mr. Johnson no longer thinks that the little bugger is so adorable.
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